Tuesday, January 20, 2009


I have the most awesome family.

My daughter welcomed me into her home - made sure I had my own space - gave me free rein over the whole house - shared her friends with me - she is awesome. She wants to protect me - she wants what's best for me.

I have two devoted sisters. They are both older than me - and probably far wiser. They have each sacrificed for me. They would do anything to help me. They tend to mother me, and I tend to let them. They want to protect me -and want the best for me.

I have 2 wonderful sons who are also very supportive. They want to protect me. They want what's best for me.

I have neices and nephews who support me, want to protect me, want the best for me.

All of them have heard my tales of woe about my last marriage. I worry that I will disappoint them if I go back. They will still love me, but will they still be supportive?

I wise person once told me that you should not air your marriage problems to your family - they love you more than your spouse and may hold a grudge against your spouse for hurting you.

Goodness! I love them all.


Mike Golch said...

this is true,spouses always get the short end of the stick. sometimes a spouce is looked down apon even it the marriage is going great.I have been on that road.my family treat my Celestine as an outsider. Her family does not treat me that way.

Qtpies7 said...

I'm not sure wise fits me, lol. But I'll take it.

I think if you have hesitations it isn't time. Not that it isn't the right thing, but the wrong time. Even the right thing at the wrong time is not right.

You NEED to find yourself and who you are in Christ before you can deal with someone else's baggage. You have to be so secure that you can deal with his abuse without taking it personal before you go back.

And you have to be strong enough not to take it to your family when it is hard. You need a friend who will never take your side in the argument to sound off to. Sounds weird, but that is what you need, someone who won't allow you to wallow in self-pity over things, but to move on and love your FLAWED partner, just as you are flawed.

I think that sometimes people do have to put up with stuff like that in life in order to help someone else. And it is worth it if it brings someone to Christ. However, you have to be strong in Christ first. It isn't true what John said to you, and I don't believe he truly meant those things. But if you can't be secure in that knowledge, you won't be able to handle it again.

Qtpies7 said...

You won't care what your sister's think if you are doing the right thing.